After Major League Baseball faced scrutiny after announcing their new rules, but they recently announced that they have a few additions that they are hoping will eliminate fans’ anxiety.
1. RELIEF PITCHERS MUST FACE TWO BATTERS: This rule comes along with the rule about starters, which we’ll call the “Brandon Woodruff Rule,” which states that starting pitchers must face three batters before being pulled. This rule is really a win because it gives previously one-batter pitchers a second chance to prove their arms and take down batters they would never have been expected to face. This also creates more skilled, seasoned pitchers with that Mariano Rivera flare, where they can demolish right-handed hitters equally as they can left-handed hitters. 2. BASERUNNERS MUST TELL FIELDER THEY’RE STEALING: This rule adds more strategy to the game and encourages a new focus on the speed of a baserunner. Baserunners must indicate to the fielder pre-pitch if they’re stealing. They can do this as close to the pitch as they would like, as long as they convey the message before the pitcher releases the ball. The fielder has this time to call out to the rest of the field that the runner is stealing, so they can jump into order and prepare to catch the speed-demon. This ingenious addition to the rulebook prevents big and slow players from risking injury and it prevents pitchers from ruining the game on wild pitches. 3. PLAYERS MUST PLAY THROUGH STREAKING FANS: With baseball trying to speed up the game, this rule is a definite time-saver. Fans often try to get themselves on camera and mess up the field of play, but now they won’t be able to get that attention, as players will just continue with business as usual. So there will be no more Jeffrey Maiers, no more Steve Bartman’s, and no more of those Astros’ fans interfering with Mookie Betts robbing a home run. The game will just have to continue and the fans will just have to sit back and accept that they can’t mess up the game. 4. DEFENSE ADDS FOURTH OUTFIELDER, OFFENSE CAN ADD SECOND BATTER: This evens the playing field. With baseball’s new rule allowing the defense to add a fourth outfielder in certain situations, the offense will be allowed to bring up a pinch hitter to stand in the batter’s box opposite the scheduled batter. When the Baltimore Orioles put their tenth player in the field to combat Aaron Judge, the Yankees will be allowed to put Brett Gardner directly opposite him and make the field an equal place. 5. ANNOUNCERS CAN DECIDE ONE CALL PER GAME, POST-SIXTH INNING: This rule has taken far too long to come into effect, now announcers can decide one call per game after the sixth inning. This rule ensures that both sides get a fair input on the game. The radio broadcasters for each team will have an opportunity to call down to their team’s dugout to tell the manager to inform the umpire when a call must be reversed. They have to do this quickly, though, as the defense can get the ball back to the picture and start the next play, rendering the announcer’s opinion on the last call a moot point, causing them to waste that call. These rules are truly wins for baseball and will be implemented this season. Of course, now it’s time to reverse this article as it is clearly fabricated, ridiculous, and a product of this insidious day known as April Fools’ Day. Jesse A. Cook “Baseball Implements Surprise Rules” April 1, 2019
0 Comments
Bartolo Colón, nicknamed “Big Sexy,” is taking a leap of faith… towards the basket.
Oh, it does come as quite a surprise to baseball fans, but the future Chicago Bull, when interviewed by ESPN representatives about going reverse-Jordan, said “It's a very special feeling to do it for one team, unlike what I did before.” He’s of course talking about how he’ll remain loyal to his Bulls fans, unlike how he traveled from organization is his 20 year, and eight team, career. Colón will finish his 20th season this year with the Atlanta Braves, but he will reportedly join the Bulls organization in the 2018-2019 season. He’s expressed how he wants to end the 2017 MLB season, but spend a year training so he can be at his “Peak ability.” Bartolo will join names like Deion Sanders, Danny Ainge, Tim Tebow, Bo Jackson, and Michael Jordan to switch sports at what Colón called “The middle of my career.” The almost 44 year old expects to have a good 10 years in the NBA. Is that so crazy? At first glance, it’s a bit unbelievable, but Big Bad Bart may have a point: he’s played baseball for this long and he has no intention of retiring anytime soon, many baseball players, including Jamie Moyer, Bronson Arroyo, and Ichiro Suzuki, played and are playing well into their forties, and Colón is one of the more agile pitchers in the game. Does it seem so insane, now? He has impeccable aim and often times, that can translate pretty smoothly to perfect aim on the court. There have been plenty of successful, large basketball players: Glenn Davis, Jared Sullinger, and Oliver Miller are only a few of the players in that category. Bartolo is a rather fast character and if baseball can no longer satisfy his sporting needs, why not give him a “shot?” He’s agile, he can move, he’s got great aim, and if I saw that racing down the court towards me, I would not want to get in his way. Braves fans will have Bartolo for the rest of the season and he’s expressed how excited he is to get a chance to play with Dansby Swanson, Freddie Freeman, R.A. Dickey, Matt Kemp, and Julio Teheràn. Colón is expected to have an impressive season with Atlanta, but several Bulls fans have made custom Colón jerseys. One fan stated that “Big Bart deserves the MLB and NBA Hall of Fame!” Strong words, but Colón could make it to Cooperstown if he plays a few more years, which does make his intersport transition a tad upsetting. Bart is also the last active player to have spent time on the Montréal Expos. His absence from the ballgame truly marks the end of an era. Everybody is a little upset, but still quite intrigued about this switch from the ballfield to the court. Sure, Benny the Bull may end up looking a bit larger than usual, but Big Bart will make a huge impact on the National Basketball Association. Colón will finish his 20th season in Major League Baseball, spend a year training for basketball, then start his NBA career with the Chicago Bulls in the 2018-2019 season. We’ve had a lot of fun with him in baseball and we’ve had way more fun with all you viewers on the wonderful April Fools’ Day. Happy April Fools’ Day, but in all seriousness, baseball begins on Monday, April 3rd. Unfortunately for me, April 1 is my birthday, so I apologize for all those victims who share the misfortune of having been born on a day where people prank you and, in France, slap fishes on your back. Happy April Fools’ Day, and let’s hope for a baseball season as fantastic as the last one! Jesse A. Cook April 1, 2017 “Big Sexy To Basketball: Bartolo Colón Leaves For The NBA” |
MLBThe Otherside page for all things MLB. Archives
January 2019
Categories
All
|