After Major League Baseball faced scrutiny after announcing their new rules, but they recently announced that they have a few additions that they are hoping will eliminate fans’ anxiety.
1. RELIEF PITCHERS MUST FACE TWO BATTERS: This rule comes along with the rule about starters, which we’ll call the “Brandon Woodruff Rule,” which states that starting pitchers must face three batters before being pulled. This rule is really a win because it gives previously one-batter pitchers a second chance to prove their arms and take down batters they would never have been expected to face. This also creates more skilled, seasoned pitchers with that Mariano Rivera flare, where they can demolish right-handed hitters equally as they can left-handed hitters. 2. BASERUNNERS MUST TELL FIELDER THEY’RE STEALING: This rule adds more strategy to the game and encourages a new focus on the speed of a baserunner. Baserunners must indicate to the fielder pre-pitch if they’re stealing. They can do this as close to the pitch as they would like, as long as they convey the message before the pitcher releases the ball. The fielder has this time to call out to the rest of the field that the runner is stealing, so they can jump into order and prepare to catch the speed-demon. This ingenious addition to the rulebook prevents big and slow players from risking injury and it prevents pitchers from ruining the game on wild pitches. 3. PLAYERS MUST PLAY THROUGH STREAKING FANS: With baseball trying to speed up the game, this rule is a definite time-saver. Fans often try to get themselves on camera and mess up the field of play, but now they won’t be able to get that attention, as players will just continue with business as usual. So there will be no more Jeffrey Maiers, no more Steve Bartman’s, and no more of those Astros’ fans interfering with Mookie Betts robbing a home run. The game will just have to continue and the fans will just have to sit back and accept that they can’t mess up the game. 4. DEFENSE ADDS FOURTH OUTFIELDER, OFFENSE CAN ADD SECOND BATTER: This evens the playing field. With baseball’s new rule allowing the defense to add a fourth outfielder in certain situations, the offense will be allowed to bring up a pinch hitter to stand in the batter’s box opposite the scheduled batter. When the Baltimore Orioles put their tenth player in the field to combat Aaron Judge, the Yankees will be allowed to put Brett Gardner directly opposite him and make the field an equal place. 5. ANNOUNCERS CAN DECIDE ONE CALL PER GAME, POST-SIXTH INNING: This rule has taken far too long to come into effect, now announcers can decide one call per game after the sixth inning. This rule ensures that both sides get a fair input on the game. The radio broadcasters for each team will have an opportunity to call down to their team’s dugout to tell the manager to inform the umpire when a call must be reversed. They have to do this quickly, though, as the defense can get the ball back to the picture and start the next play, rendering the announcer’s opinion on the last call a moot point, causing them to waste that call. These rules are truly wins for baseball and will be implemented this season. Of course, now it’s time to reverse this article as it is clearly fabricated, ridiculous, and a product of this insidious day known as April Fools’ Day. Jesse A. Cook “Baseball Implements Surprise Rules” April 1, 2019
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